Serendipity

Naturally I think I’m an anxious person. I don’t want to say I have anxiety because I believe everyone has anxiety. People self diagnose and used anxiety as a crutch, an excuse for why they can’t do the things they should be doing. Over the years, anxiety has been given a negative connotation, a means for people to forbid change and perspective for the betterment of themselves.

In my case, I do believe that I’m a very anxious person but I don’t mean it the way you’re all assuming. I’ve always been uncomfortable with being comfortable, I understand routine and the necessity of it, but I can only allow routine for so long before its like a river that draws stale. I may find myself in uncomfortable positions but there’s an understanding that if I feel unsettled or uncomfortable, it’s my mind and bodies way of telling me that I’ve settled and I’m not ready for that just yet.

I’ve been a dreamer since I was 15, I knew then that the path my life would take would be the most unconventional route to exist. That many of the decisions that I would make would dictate the outcome that I would carry. I have a basic understanding that life will never go as planned. I have seen life demolish years and years of planning, simply to have me learn to adapt and learn about serendipity. I learned that beneath the definition of serendipity was the biggest lessoned to be learned about anxiety. I understand it now to be the peace amongst chaos, the gem among stones.

For it is not what we see in the moment, but the sculpture sculpted by the end of the journey. The roughest times simply allow for us to be shaped accordingly. No sculpture is beautiful without being chiselled and hammered. We as humans were built to face the stresses of the world, we were built to adapt and survive. We are also built with this innate fear that becomes a crutch and breaks us. We were born with free will. The will to keep living, to keep fighting. This innate fear I speak of is true to even the strongest of people, but for them, the desperation to keep living is much greater than knowing they live to die. We build our will to fight by conquering our worst fears. The imprint left behind will become a beacon for others to follow.

Remember, we have control of aspects of our lives and other aspects, we might not. So breathe and take control of the aspects you can and push forward until you look back and see a life you are proud of.